— Gary Ryan Blair
Let me make this one real simple for you…What you DO is who you are.
If there’s ever a discrepancy between what someone does, and what someone says…focus on their actions.
Behavior Never Lies.
When a person’s words and behaviors are not in sync, the result is fraud, hypocritical behavior.
The disconnect between what people say versus what they actually do steals trust, sends mixed messages, distorts reality, undermines communication, and creates doubt.
It negatively impacts all parties, the giver and receiver. The challenge we all face is to balance the spoken word with our actions.
When spoken words and demonstrated behavior are not in alignment, one will feel confusion, frustration and disappointment. Words may attempt to explain, but behavior defines the real message you are sending.
I can tell you this with complete confidence…
By examining your behavior…I can see a clear picture of your commitment, I can gain an innate sense of your character, I can grasp a near perfect understanding of your beliefs, and I can most certainly see what you are really made of.
Your behavior is a reflection of what you believe to be true about yourself.
Your behavior tells me how you think.
Your behavior tells me how you talk about yourself even when no one’s around.
Your behavior tells me what you do or do not do every single day.
The real essence of truth, of who you really are is not found in what you say, but by what you do. Once again, what you DO is who you are.
Here are a few examples:
When you say that you’re a professional and eager for new opportunities, but you show up late and unprepared…your behavior rats you out.
When you say that you love someone, but do not demonstrate that love through your actions…this behavior creates doubt and sends the message that your words are hollow.
When you say that you value and believe in good health, but you dine on junk food and do not exercise…your behavior exposes you as a fraud.
When you say one thing to your employees or children, but act in a totally different manner…your behavior screams hypocrisy.
When mission statements and service creeds extol excellence, great value, and customer devotion, but your behavior demonstrates apathy and mediocrity…your customers look at you and your company as a joke.
Here’s a mathematical perspective on the relationship between words and actions:
Values and Philosophies — What We Say
+ Policies and Practices — What We Do
= Results and Perceptions — What We Get!
Results are everything and if you are not pleased with your results, and if the perception you have created is not the one that you find desirous…then you better get to work on making sure that your behavior is in harmony with your words — there is no other way to close this perception gap!
The real power and influence of an organization’s leaders, of parents raising children…and of any person who wants to initiate change comes down to their ability to walk their talk…to ensure that there is an absence of contraction between what they say and what they actually do.
It’s the shortest journey to empower change, the office culture and the environment in your own home.
The following is your 5 point plan for living a life absent of contradiction.
1. Model the type of behavior you want to see practiced by others.
There is nothing more powerful for people to experience than observing you demonstrate the actions and behaviors you are requesting from others.
As Mahatma Gandhi said, “Become the change you wish to see in the world.”
2. If you make a rule or design a process…follow it to the letter.
Why would anyone be inclined to follow the rules if the rule makers don’t?
3. Reward and celebrate the behaviors you want demonstrated.
Inspire, hold up and publicly acknowledge the virtuous behavior you want to see repeated and reinforced.
4. Do what you say you’re going to do…and do it immediately.
Don’t make rash promises that you can’t keep. People want to trust you and your leadership. Always demonstrate initiative and personal responsibility.
5. Honor your commitments, keep your promises and actively practice what you preach.
With these five steps as a guide, you will be prepared to live a life where you are free to reach a place where confusion, contradiction, and hypocrisy no longer define who you are.
Behavior Never Lies is more than a broad statement…it is a truth that when understood and accepted, will transform your own life and provide you with a better understanding of the people who are part of your life.
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