So here we are…knocking on the door of a New Year…and if you’re looking to make history rather than repeat it…if you’re really determined to make this the best year of your life…then you’re going to want to reflect on and take stock of what’s transpired over this past year.
And, that includes the good, the bad and the ugly.
Let’s get started by focusing on four hard, messy, difficult, useful questions to sit with and reflect upon as this year draws to an end.
1. What do I need to purge from my life?
Because I’m nice…I’m starting with an easy transition question for you, letting you in gently before I drop the hammer.
This is a question for all of us who are overwhelmed, over-committed and especially for those who are overweight.
If your New Year Resolution involves getting you healthy, both physically and mentally…you must begin by focusing on purging the people, places and things that negatively impact your life…that derail progress…that compromise your character in any way.
This is important because for you to operate at the peak of your potential you must achieve a state of moral, spiritual and physical renewal and complete liberation from negative influences.
So, what are the non-negotiables…the people, places and things that are not permitted, that must be intentionally purged for the betterment of yourself, clients, community and your overall peace of mind?
That’s an excellent place to start focusing on your New Year Resolutions.
2. Where do I experience the greatest fear and resistance?
Your greatest competitor…the greatest opposition force that stands between you and your goals…the #1 thing that keeps you in your comfort and which prevents you from unleashing your greatness is RESISTANCE.
Resistance is a psychological choke hold, toxic mental waste that’s harder to kick than a heroin habit.
Resistance prevents writers from writing…painters from painting…actors from acting…salespeople from selling…and leaders from leading.
Resistance is the culprit behind every unhappy marriage, every hidden vice, every unmet goal and every unfulfilled life.
Behind resistance is pain avoidance and dealing with pain demands strength you may not think you have.
Resistance is the reason you make the wrong decision, even though you may know what the right one is.
Resistance explains why people live two lives…the live they live, and the unlived bold, daring and beautiful life they wish they could live.
Resistance has evil intentions…it’s the voice of doubt, it undermines your confidence and its endgame is your total and complete destruction.
Resistance will always…
…work to undermine you and crush your belief in yourself.
…call for and demand your resignation letter.
…ruthlessly attempt to extract a pound of flesh.
…goad and prod you into quitting.
What scares you…what fear keeps you up late at night…what resistance force must you confront and overcome in order to make this a breakthrough year for you?
That’s another great source of fuel for your New Year Resolutions.
3. How did I let myself down?
I know this question feels like putting a kick me sign on your back. But heck, you’re here now. So why not confront this beast of a question straight up and get to the root of the problem.
Allow me to prompt you …
• Promises broken.
• Standards compromised.
• Opportunities avoided.
• People betrayed.
• Values downplayed.
The greatest and most unfortunate betrayal is that of oneself. Being able to adhere to our commitments begins with self-respect.
When we say one thing and do another — when we start projects but don’t finish them; when we go on a diet but quit soon after beginning — then the only thing at which we become successful is sabotaging our reputation with ourselves.
Allow yourself to get angry, sad and gentle with yourself. Set a New Year Resolution to redeem yourself…to stage a comeback…and to right some wrongs as this provides fertile ground for self-improvement and personal growth.
4. Where am I headed?
You begin the New Year in just a few days and if you want to make it the best year of your life…implement this little trick that Scorsese, Spielberg and Disney use when creating a movie.
• Work backwards.
• Begin at the finish.
• Know how you want it to end.
• Solve the climax first.
• Figure out where you want to go; then work backwards from there.
I encourage you to spend the next few days writing the screenplay for what’s about to take place. Know how you want the year to end.
You get to write, direct and star in your own movie. It’s your life, therefore it’s your responsibility to solve the climax first.
Set a New Year Resolution to become the hero of your story.
Choose to star in your own action movie this year…create an plot dripping with excitement, boldness, audacity, inspiration, great challenges and huge accomplishments …a movie with stakes high enough to make it truly riveting…one that you not only star in, but one where you become your own hero.
It takes courage, character and tenacity to live the life of your dreams…and if you’re not the hero of your own story, than you’re missing the whole point of your humanity.
By anyone’s measure choosing to become your own hero is one heck of a New Year Resolution.
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